izigame.me

The 80s. What comes to mind when you hear this? Purple backdrop, shiny lines, grids, mullets and other weird hairstyles... you know the drill. But here's the thing: that's just American 80s. This might come as a shock, but there actually is a world outside of 'Murica, which even has (gasp!) places that have independent culture! I know imagining this is probably as hard as imagining the amount of atoms in the universe, but bear with me here.
Turns out more and more games are starting to explore this world-shattering revelation. In particular, the post-Soviet countries who had their culture enforced by the Russian state during the 80s are happily discovering that they share a lot of... baggage? Quirks? Imagery? Something like that. And we're not talking idealised vision of the Soviet Union as it exists in the mind of a middle class young adult who grew up in American Suburbia - we're talking how it actually was, as remembered by people who either lived through it, or grew up in the ruins of that order.
Such as myself.

Blah blah, tell me about the game you gopnik

"Czechoslovakian Quake". Or rather, that's what it starts out as, and then it really blazes its own trail and just blazes it in general. And the only reason why all this fun Soviet stuff matters is because it actually plays damn well. The level design is varied in spite of everything looking grey, the weaponry walks the fine line between weird and classic, and oh boy are there a lot of enemies. Including bosses (some of which have multiple forms) there are a whopping 50 different types. To put this number into perspective, DUSK has 33 (including bosses), out of which 9 are a size/colour/stat variant of an otherwise identical another one. In HROT, this number is, uh, 0. Every enemy is completely unique.
Actually, the variety kinda reminds me of Northern Journey, although its nowhere near at that level. Still, the fact that I even had this thought while playing it should give you a good idea of what to expect (provided you played Northern Journey).

Post-soviet Circlejerk

There's more variety than just enemy variety - and it stems from the dev's inexplicable willingness to cram in a lot of nostalgic junk. It's gratuitous as f*ck and I love it. Maybe this is why the Murites love their 80s so much, because of this feeling?
In HROT you'll find things I forgot even existed. There's this weird 3-chamber container for... "lunch" would be the best translation, but it's not quite that. There's a spinning top toy, and it mesmerised me just the same as when I got one for Christmas roughly 30 years ago. There's the foughken COMMUNAL DRYING ROOM. And much, much more; but since I didn't grow up in what used to be Czechoslovakia, there's probably a lot I didn't catch.
There's also drugs.

Bruh this samogon doesn't hit hard enough

The further you progress in the game, the more unhinged things become. But not in a psychological horror style. It's more like, you're hanging out with the bois, hitting the cheap wine mixed with off-brand cola, and suddenly Paweł suggests going out for a midnight stroll. Two hours later, you find yourself helping him climb the power pole because he needs to look out for the neighbour's flying car, because he's definitely a Russian sleeper agent.
It's like that.
And HROT doesn't make you question whether things are real or not. You do eat magic mushrooms at some point, but otherwise who cares? It's real, just roll with it, details be damned. Just enjoy the ride. And boy, is the ride enjoyable, especially the final boss. I hope you'll enjoy blasting his face off as much as I did - using the BRNO Super Shotgun (I call him "Bruno", he's me mate) and the Hussite Hand Cannon which is totally not a rocket launcher, of course!

Tvoja mamicka to (EXPLETIVE REDACTED)

If you understood what I just said, then this game might be for you. It's probably wrong anyway.
What's that, you want a conclusion? Fine. 20% of all players have beaten the final boss. At the same time, 57% of players have the achievement for killing all mobs in a level, which I think is relatively easy. Does this mean some 40% of players lose interest instantly, or that they haven't launched the game? In any case, there's a 30% chance of you finishing the game if you actually get into it. Is that good? I'd say its pretty decent. But I'm clearly the target audience here, so I might be biased.
Also, Paweł, you were a good friend, once. That power pole idea was stupid but I'm glad we did it.
Lofi beats for post-gopnik pseudo-intellectuals ONLY